Posted by Communitas

By: Paul Anderson

ASSESSMENT. Ask your parents to meet and share what your strengths and weaknesses are. Our greatest need is an accurate picture of God; second—an accurate view of ourselves. It allows us to relate successfully with others.

Your parents know you better than anyone else. Listen to them affirm you and reflect on weaknesses. We all have them. You may feel like getting defensive, but you won’t, because you are asking for this gift.

Do not disagree. Identity drives destiny. The better you know yourself, the more ready you are to walk into your God-appointed destiny.

GRATITUDE. Few things open the heart like gratitude. Young adults sometimes find themselves at a standoff with their parents. They go home for Christmas break and expect to see a change in Mom and Dad. After all, they have changed. They want to be treated differently.

Unfortunately, they are sometimes treated the way they always were. Offense overtakes gratitude. The best way to open the door to communication and a maturing relationship is to show gratitude. Did the lights go on when you flipped the switch growing up? Thank Dad for paying the utility bill. Did you ever find cookies when you got home from school? Did she carry you the distance, increasingly uncomfortable? Thank her.

Take nothing for granted. Write it down. It will become a living document for your parents, open up new communication, and tell heaven that you do want to honor your parents. Honor brings a good life and a long one.

CONFESSION. Most young adults have had a time when they took a detour and did things that grieved their parents. While you may have confessed times when you did wrong, it would be good to sit down with Dad and Mom and say something like this, “I look back with much grief in my heart for the ways I have disobeyed you, disregarded your counsel, thought I knew more than you did, tried to get out from under your control. I lied too many times and tried to deceive you. I did things for which I am truly ashamed (name them if you have not before). I am truly sorry.

I want to be a good parent when God grants me that privilege. So I want to clear these things with you, so they don’t hang on with me and keep me from receiving honor from my children. Thank you for being my Dad and Mom. I know God gave you to me. I bless you and always will.”